It’s so crucial to tap into your elders for family history. And, it’s never too early. My Cousin Crystal recently reached out to gather the elders in order to collect the Boxill family history in order to digitize and archive.
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Today we had a zoom that included Cousin Sylvia (not pictured-audio only), who is Pop’s 99 year-old first cousin. Pop who is 91. And, Aunt Vilma, who is Pop’s 87 year-old sister. We are so grateful and blessed that they are still here, present, focused, and able to contribute. We were able to collaborate on collecting a lot of information. The holes will be filled in during part two.
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One interesting fact is, while I speak often of Trinidad, it wasn’t clear to me until recent years that my great grandparents on both sides of my family (Boxill and Clarke) were from Barbados. It sheds a bright light on why I also love Barbados so much. It’s the best of both Caribbean worlds.
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Thank you Cousin Crystal for getting us together today. Pop really enjoyed the time. He was dropping some nuggets to include the dramas. We all got em. They were surprised at how much he remembers. I can’t wait to hear more from the elders and other family members and to see what is created.
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Afterwards Pop said “You people are getting old. The older you live, the longer you live.” 😆 🤦🏽♀️ Be blessed. Be grateful. Enjoy. Peace. Be safe. Be well. Love. #BeDoLove #91YearsYoung #CareGiversMatter #CareGiver #CareGivers #FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #Trinidad #Barbados
This morning at 7amish, I check on Pop as I exit the bathroom. Pop says “Let’s have some coffee together.”Mind you, I thought I was going to get a nice quick zzzz. Thinking if I drink coffee right now, that’s it, I’m up. Maxwell House coffee break won with our favorite mugs.
I give thanks and am grateful today that on Thursday, November 26, 2020 Pop is still with us, sipping coffee, dropping nuggets, taking ish, and laughing.
He’s going from topic to topic. The Supreme Court on NY church/synagogue court case. Flynn. Rush and Freedom of something medal. Obama “Amazing man. He had the love and everything else.” Sean Connery in TMC movie late last night with Ossie Davis. Tonight’s NFL game cancellation. “Big game. I was biting for that one. That’s alright. I’ll pretend the Steelers won.” Now he randomly requested “Laurel and Hardy.” And, now we are watching the Macy’s Day Parade in between Pop’s family/Trinidad/steel pan history nuggets. How appropriate as he was talking history the parade’s Caribbean masqueraders and steel pan performance came on. Pop: That’s beautiful. Turn that up. 🇹🇹
Oh, and Pop declared he was getting ready for Thanksgiving. I guess it’s a Howard kind of day. HUUUUU… U Know!!!
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Happy Thanksgiving! Be blessed. Be grateful. Enjoy. Peace. Be safe. Be well. Love. #BeDoLove #91YearsYoung #CareGiversMatter #CareGiver #CareGivers FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud
Something very special and magical happened this past 9/11. Pop described it as “AMAZING” and “BLOCKBUSTER!” Before I go into detail, first I’d like to say thank YOU and Happy Veterans to all the veterans.
The Montgomery Hospice & Prince George’s Hospice did a beautiful thing by honoring Pop with a Veteran’s Pinning Ceremony this past 9/11. It was a celebration and recognition of Pop’s service in the Army and is typically done in person. However, due to COVID it was via zoom, which worked out great to allow for family and friends from near and far to join in.
Michael Oliver (the veteran’s volunteer) led the celebration with engaging Pop and sharing details of his service from my covert pre-interviews. Read more about it below. And, review the full zoom recording here https://youtu.be/0m-1C_t_whg and excerpts in the image and comments. It really was nice.
Also during the ceremony, which included Micheal’s thoughtful acknowledgment of Pop’s service, our nurse Christina was on hand to present the items, which consisted of a certificate, pin, star, and blanket. [at 0:08:00 of above YouTube video link] And, Chaplain Renee [0:25:23] and Travonne our Social Worker [0:31:30] were also in attendance. And, we got a chuckle out of how Pop almost got kicked out of hospice. [0:31:25] They really are a professional and caring team. Sidebar: We took the time to acknowledge Christina for her amazing service as a hospice nurse and the way she loves up on Pop always with a heart warming smile. She was pregnant at the time and we gifted her with a card and baby gift. She’s currently on maternity leave and we miss her. [0:27:21]
Pop and Nurse Christina
The funny part is the event was a surprise. I told Pop we were having a zoom and requested that he wear a button down shirt. Nurse Christina came as if only to do her visit. When it’s time for the zoom he comes out in a hoodie… I was like, Pop… He went and changed
The cool part was Pop wearing his nearly 70 year-old Army jacket and my brother Greg reminiscing about it. They were surprised that I’ve had it for quite some time. [0:22:11]
A very special moment was my cousin, Sargent First Class Santina sharing her thoughts about her joining the Army and being inspired by Pop. She is often the youngest and most decorated in the room. And, Pop was in awe and proud of Santina’s rank position in just 14 years of service. [0:20:09] She also chimed in to explain the star that was one of the gifts and how they are usually stars from an actual flag that’s gifted to veterans. [0:13:05]
Sargent First Class
It was truly a beautiful experience. So much so that immediately afterwards and the days proceeding the event, Pop was still expressing his amazement of it all. Feeling like how did he deserve such an honoring. [0:32:25]
About Pop’s Service:
Enric Q. Boxill came to the U.S. on March 6, 1949, joining his mother and sisters who were already living in Harlem. Two years after arriving here and a few weeks shy of turning 22, Pop was drafted into the Army, serving two years from May 22, 1951-May 23, 1953.
When Pop was asked why he joined the Army, he said “I was told to.” If not, he would have had to return to Trinidad. [0:00:03]
When he joined the Army, he wasn’t a U.S. citizen. During those times he would have had to serve at least three years before becoming a citizen. [0:18:00]
His basic training took place at Ft. Nix in New Jersey. And, he served in the Special Services Unit 4077 at Ft. Myer in Arlington, VA. There he first delivered the Daily Bulletin on the base. And, later he worked in the Post Office doing change of addresses for officers passing through. [0:02:50]
This particular base was a stop for enlisted celebrities and athletes. He saw celebrity soldiers like Eddie Fisher (Debbie Reynolds father and married to Elizabeth Taylor) and Vic DeMoan. And, he would run in the morning with a boxer in training so he could get the good eggs and not Army eggs. [0:03:45]
At that time the troops were segregated. All Black units existed until just before he stopped serving. The majority of Black troops had duties other than combat, such as kitchen duty, orderlies, etc. [0:05:27]
During his spare time, on occasion Pop would travel into DC to listen to jazz greats such as saxophonist Gerry Mulligan. Probably visiting the U Street area, also known as Black Broadway back then. [0:02:50]
Shortly after Pop was drafted into the Army, his brother Clive enlisted in the Air Force.
Watching the recording last night filled me with gratitude for the moment and for Pop knowing he is appreciated and loved. Peace. Be safe. Love. #BeDoLove #91YearsYoung #CareGiversMatter #CareGiver #CareGivers FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #VeteransDay #Veteran #ArmyVeteran
Bless his heart. I thought Pop went to sleep for the night. Next thing I know around 2:30am I’m awakened to him yelling and cussing 🤬at the top of his lungs as he just heard the I won speech. As I went for a late night relief 🚽, I stopped to check on Pop and calm him so he didn’t also wake the neighbors.
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Well fast forward to almost 7am and Pop is now practicing self-care while listening/napping to classical music 🎼 🎻 🎹 . See/Listen for yourself here: https://youtu.be/hv3lvn5iBi8 And, be like Pop. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. And, practice whatever self-care works for you. I think I’m going to try my hand at baking some Banana Chocolate Bread Pudding Cups.
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As Pop would say, “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!” Peace. 🙏🏾
Pop thinks his first time voting for the President of the United States was for John F. Kennedy in 1959. He hadn’t voted prior to that because he wasn’t a US citizen (Became a citizen around 1954.). I asked what would he consider the most important election for him. His response was Lyndon B. Johnson in 1962 because of the Civil Rights movement. Last night I watched “LBJ” on Amazon, which provided some great perspective. Check out Pop’s video for more on his thoughts. He’s concerned that he may have committed treason. 🧐😆 https://youtu.be/dN6zt1g2bZE
And, with this probably being his 2nd most important election, Pop was clear he wanted to vote in this election. Needed to vote. So off I went to obtain his ballet mailed from Kings County (Brooklyn). Earlier this month, I mailed his ballet and dropped mine off at the Maryland State Board of Elections because I wanted no parts in random ballet box shenanigans.
I’m grateful to have been present to support Pop with completing his ballet. To include catching him, placing an x instead of filling in the bubbles. There was no room for having his vote not count. And, I’m relieved that both of our ballets were received and confirmed.
So to Biden and Kamala Harris, Democratic candidate for the Vice President of the United States and our Howard University Bison Crew, “HUUUUU… U Know!” Enjoy! Love! VOTE! #BeDoLove #91YearsYoung #CareGiversMatter #FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #InTruthAndService
I fell in love with pastrami as a young girl. Pop would on occasion treat us to pastrami from Katz Delicatessen. Arriving home with it deliciously sliced and wrapped in the white butcher type paper. Since Pop’s Katz trips were on occasion, I would get my in between fixes with the neighborhood bodega’s pastrami hero sandwiches, warmed of course.
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Fast forward, here is my version of a Pastrami Reuben. Previously, when out, I would always substitute the rye bread for something like sourdough. This also occurred with Patty Melts. The rye was just too much for my palate. Now look at me? In 2020, marble rye has become my new culinary BFF, as a result of a recent visit to The Bagelry in Silver Spring where the marble rye bagel was recommended for the reuben.
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My version of a Pastrami Reuben has pastrami (over corned beef), guyere cheese (instead of Swiss), cole slaw (prefer over sauerkraut), thousand island dressing, and caramelized onions (added touch) on pan toasted buttered marble rye bread. I happened upon the Capital Baking Company marble rye bread (Giant’s deli counter) which is so good with great texture, thickness, and flavor. Hmm… Hmm… Good… with lots of yummy drippings (what slides down your hand). 😋😍 PS: Pop approved. Bon Appetit. Enjoy! Love! #BeDoLove #91YearsYoung #CareGiversMatter #FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #BeDoLoveSAVOR #BonAppetit #IChefToWriteAboutIt #Yummylicious #Yummyliciousness #Foodie #FoodieLife #ExpandYourPalate #Pastrami #PastramiReuben
This was me and my cool a$$ Pop exactly 50 years ago today in 1970 at the annual Labor Day West Indian Day Parade on Eastern Parkway in my beloved Crown Heights, Brooklyn. I was almost three months shy of my fourth birthday. I am posting it today on Labor Day in honor of my family and friends, and especially my father and mother (both Trinidadians). After carnival in Trinidad (the crème de la crème of Caribbean carnivals), Brooklyn’s is next in line across the world. This parade has grown to now play host to at least 1.0 million revelers. Of course due to COVID it’s not taking place in its normal format. However, the New Yorker’s West Indian spirit is not to be stopped from celebrating/liming in their own way.
Pop and Aunt Barbara supporting Uncle Clyde with his costume at Brooklyn’s West Indian Day Parade in the 1970s. Aunt Barbara and Uncle Clyde at Brooklyn’s West Indian Day Parade in the 1970s.
I noticed something interesting, when I went off to Howard University and in my later years. It became the one time of year my dad ALWAYS wanted me to come home. Not Christmas. Not Thanksgiving. Not his birthday. But, for the weekend of the Labor Day West Indian Parade. So much so, he’d attempt to entice me with, “I’m cooking cod fish and coco this weekend.” And/or he’d ask “You coming up?” “You here?” And, when I didn’t travel, I could feel the energy of his pout as this event has been steeped in family tradition for many, many years.
Celebrating with my Brooklyn St. Mark Massive on Eastern Parkway.My nephew Clive holding down family traditions. At 2019 West Indian Day Parade in Brooklyn.
In the 1940s-1950s, both sides of my family (grandparents, aunts, uncles) migrated to Harlem from Trinidad. The first Caribbean carnivals in NYC took place in Harlem and then moved to Brooklyn. Pop said the parades could have been larger back then, but many did not claim their Caribbean roots as a result of stigma and/or unhealed wounds. But, not my family as they would participate and play mas from Harlem to Brooklyn with Trini pride.
While growing up in Brooklyn, me and my immediate family lived four blocks down the hill from the parade (Crown Street bet. Troy & Albany). My grandmother lived one block up from us on Carroll Street. My great aunt’s Helen and Sybil lived down the hill. And, my Aunt Vilma still lives down the hill on Brooklyn Avenue. Growing up I would attend the parade with family and family friends. That is until I got grown enough to attend with my friends. Lol But regardless of how family branched out, it was always our tradition to connect at the same spot on de parkway. This is on Eastern Parkway & Brooklyn Avenue, which is right at the corner of our family church, Church of St. Mark. This always preceded and proceeded with a stop at my Aunt Vilma’s house, which is considered Labor Day liming headquarters. And, even up until last year, the tradition was still intact. It is such a lovely time.
2010 Trinidad Carnival playing mas with Tribe. 2010 Trinidad Carnival with my Trini tribe playing mas with Tribe. 2010 Trinidad Carnival with my Trini tribe.
Three people who I loved to watch their flow through the years were Pop, Aunt Vilma, and their first cousin Joan (would come up from DC). Even into their 70s-80s years of age, from visiting the Pan Yards, to the Steel Band Panorama, to Kiddie Carnival, to J’ouvert, to the parade, they would go. I loved experiencing their enthusiastic, energetic, and loving connection. Now fast forward to the 2000s and my nieces and nephews are carrying the torch. Last year, while Pop was in the hospital I attended the parade. It warmed my heart that my nephew Clive was upholding the family tradition of jumping up and enjoying the parade at our family spot at Eastern Parkway & Brooklyn Avenue. It truly is in our DNA and threw example to embrace our Trinidadian Roots. To include my pilgrimages to Trinidad for Carnival, participating in the DC and Baltimore carnivals to play mas or mud band, and feting from sun up to sundown. To even corny rituals with friends, such as Lisa and I never letting the day go by without a 🎶Mondaaaay on de Parkwaaaayyyyy!🎶 shout out. 😍🤣 And, because of my pride I loved the opportunity to introduce friends such as Margo (RIP) to the experience.
Me and Margo (RIP)at DC Caribbean Carnival. 2013 DC/Baltimore Carnival playing with the Mud Band. That tank top was white. 2013 Baltimore/DC Caribbean Carnival. RIP Camesha.
I thank God for blessing me with these roots for it has enriched my life in profound and joyful ways. As you can see this has been in me and of me before birth. Who knows what the future holds for the parade in Brooklyn and even in Trinidad. But, one thing is for sure is that Caribbean folk will always lime and fete like none other. And, I hope you will find time to exhale and have fun in your own traditional and new ways. Enjoy your day, however, you intend to celebrate. Be safe. Love! #BeDoLove #CaregiversMatter #91YearsYoung #CrownHeightsBrooklyn #WestIndianDayParade #wiadca #wiadca2020 #TrinidadAndTobago #JumpAndWave #SweetTAndT #SocaIsInMyBloodItsInMyVeins #PuffBallsDontCare
“Lime” is a word used in Trinidad and Tobago and throughout the Caribbean as a synonym for “a gathering” or “to hang out.” To lime (liming)is to simply pass time and enjoy yourself, with your tribe, in whatever way you like!
Last year, shortly after celebrating Pop’s 90th on what was also Father’s Day, he became extremely ill. This followed with him spending pretty much the entire summer of 2019 in Kingsbrook Hospital in Crown Heights, Brooklyn. His long stay resulting in Ostomy surgery and being diagnosed with stage four cancer, which started in the colon and spread to the lungs and liver. Upon his release one year ago today, he immediately (We left the hospital, he grabbed a few things and we were off.) came to Maryland to live with me.
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Well Pop turned 91 on June 16. Praise God! Because also almost a year ago, he was given 6 months to a year to live. And, HERE.WE.ARE! The video (https://youtu.be/uT07rfCW-3o) was shot on Pop’s 91st and his message was “Let Them Be.” Which speaks to who he is with his displays of unconditional love, which has always allowed me and many others to “BE!” It’s a message to us all about allowing others to “BE” who they are meant to be and not who you think they should be. And, remembering we all have our own unique personalities and purposes, that should be nurtured to flourish, bloom, and BE!
Pop’s fun and inspiring words on his 91st birthday on June 20, 2020.
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From the hospital to now being roommates for a year, Pop has been an amazing example. Even in the face of great pain, uncertainty, discomfort, upsets, loss of a great deal of his independence, and a major unexpected move in the past year, Pop has and continues to be an example of what grace, perseverance, kindness (displayed to the nurses and other hospital staff), fun, and not a care in the world looks like. And, he remains the coolest man on the planet.
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Pop, whose been a father figure to many through the years, we continue to be so grateful for your sound intellectual mind to include teachable moments in all things related to integrity and worldly in news, sports, and music (especially jazz and classical), good health, great spirit, get up and go (still plays games, plays along with Jeopardy, and does his crossword puzzles, reads like crazy), Trinidadian roots/birth, Brooklyn swag, intact fashion sense, spiritual essence, a sense of humor, mastery of witticism, hearty laughter, and sweet giggles. And, our “Morning Pop Talk” are always what the doctor has ordered to lighten my spirit and keep me moving through the day. And, I’m sure for others as you typically end the conversation with your loving and inspirational words.
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I‘m so blessed and grateful for the unconditional love you consistently shower on me and others. It’s a beautiful way of being you that continues to be an example for us all. You’re an awesome man Pop. You are #BeDoLove. You are the man, the myth, the legend. 😍
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Thank you God for gifting us Pop. We are ever so grateful for Pop to be here to continue experiencing the fruits of his labor as I and my family get to provide more and more proud and fun moments for him to witness and brag about. And, as we get to brag about how awesome he is. Pop, I pray for your continued good health, peace and an abundance of love and sweet giggles. We love YOOOUUUU Pop! Cheers!!!
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In the words of Pop “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!” #MorningPopTalk #BeDoLove #91YearsYoung #CareGiversMatter #FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFullPurpose
Please tune into INSIDE OUT LGBT RADIO SHOW today, Tuesday, August 4, 2pm-3pm EST. Tune in from the DMV at WPFW 89.3 FM or stream live ANYWHERE at www.wpfwfm.org. Please share and spread the word.
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Please join me and my guests Lorine Pendleton and Danielle Ricks, for what we hope is a thoughtful, informative, and inspiring conversation of how they are being of contribution to a diverse community of entrepreneurs and how you can birth and grow your entrepreneurial spirit.
Thank you for the love and support. Send us good vibes. Make it a safe and beautiful day. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove!#WPFW #InsideOutLGBTRadioShow #Portfolia #DCSBDCcovid19 #SmallBusiness #BeDoLove #FindYourZen #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFULLPurpose #JuicySweetSpot #LivingOutLoud #Howarding #HowardUniversity #InTruthAndService #BleedBlue #HUYouKnow
Pop: Nevermind, don’t tell me. 😆 (Because, he knows I’m up to something.)
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There was a time Bourbon was too heavy on my palate and chest. As the 2000s mixology craze began, I was reintroduced to gin, which I love. However, at some point I desired to mix it up. And, as I saw many delicious looking cocktails prepared with bourbon, I went for it. Forcing my palate to expand, in the past few years I’ve become a Bourbon fan.
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Yesterday, I realized I’ve gifted bottles of bourbon’s to others’ households, but not mine. So, I stopped at a liquor store where all of the spirits were behind glass (except beer and wine) and got the last bottle of Woodford Reserve Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey. Hey, if I’m going to do it, DO IT.
