Morning Pop Talk – Parang/Happy Boxill I Mean Boxing Day

Pop: 🎶Goooood Morning! Happy Boxing Day.🎶 Not, Happy Boxill Day. But, Happy Boxing Day. But, Happy Boxill Day too.

Me: 😳😆 Pop, What is Boxing Day?

Pop: It started in England. In Trinidad it’s a holiday where people wore costumes and steel bands played similar to carnival. I don’t know if they do that anymore. (See a description of Boxing Day below that’s related to slavery.)

Pop: On Christmas Day people would come around playing guitars and singing Christmas carols or other music. (Me: Parang. ((See description and must see video below.))) For Christmas even as children we would have wine or really good port wine. Although I didn’t have anything to drink yesterday. (Pop is still salty that he didn’t have a drink yesterday since he’s on an antibiotic.)

As Pop would say, “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!” “Oh, and Happy Holidays!” #MorningPopTalk #CareGiversMatter

PS: Santa gave Pop an iPad for Christmas. He loves to play games like Solitaire, Mahjong, and Bridge. Although I doubt it, maybe he’ll read from it. I think he prefers the feel of the newspapers and books. Any other games you think he may like?

PSS: My bucket list is to visit Trinidad for Christmas. I love love love string instruments to now include the cuatro. I looked up Boxing Day. And, there are various and conflicting theories regarding its origin. One is below. Also, below is a nice video on Parang. So interesting and rich in history. Trinidad continues to amaze me as a very diverse country. Chinese, Indians, Venezuelans…

Boxing Day

“There’s not one agreed-upon origin story for Boxing Day — the deeper you dig, the greater the confusion. What we know for sure is that the holiday originated in Britain, back in medieval times.

Common theories all involve some variation on the theme of giving to those less fortunate. Some believe the term “Boxing Day” comes from the practice of the rich donating a wooden box of Christmas leftovers to their servants and apprentices — who would work Christmas Day, but have December 26 off to celebrate with their families. It could also refer to collection boxes set up at churches, their contents distributed to the poor on December 26 — the day of the Feast of St. Stephen, a Christian martyr known for acts of charity… In Caribbean regions that were once under British rule, the charity box exchange on December 26 wasn’t between aristocrats and employees — it was between slave-owners and their slaves. Boxing Day was likely the only day off from forced labor that slaves received all year. Among their descendants, December 26 has become a dance party, a day of artistic expression, and a celebration of Afro-Caribbean culture… The Boxing Day street parade in Trinidad & Tobago is J’ouvert, which in this case is the opening party of the larger celebration of Carnival.” —


A Celebration of Parang: The Indigenous Sounds of Trinidad & Tobago


“Parang is a popular folk music originating from Venezuela and Trinidad and Tobago that was brought to Trinidad and Tobago by Venezuelan and Colombian migrants who were primarily of Amerindian, Spanish, Mestizo, Pardo, Cocoa panyol, and African heritage, something which is strongly reflected in the music itself. The word is derived from two Spanish words: parranda, meaning “a spree or fête”, and parar meaning “to stop”.

In Trinidad, traditional parang music is largely performed around Christmastime, when singers and instrumentalists (collectively known as the parranderos) travel from house to house in the community, often joined by friends and neighbours family etc. using whatever instruments are at hand. In exchange for the entertainment, parranderos are traditionally given food and drink: pasteles, pastelle, sorrel, rum and Ponche Crema (a form of alcoholic eggnog).” —

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🎶I Know You Heard Me on the Radio. TRRUUUUEEEE!!!🎶 – Being Financially Responsible into the New Year & Beyond

Update: If you missed this amazing and VERY INFORMATIVE show, click the link to listen in.

Enjoy the show at home, your desk, while driving, preparing dinner… You may also subscribe to our podcast on iTunes at WPFW – Inside Out to enjoy previously recorded shows.

Come back and share your thoughts. Thank you for the love and support. See you next time. Make it a safe and beautiful week. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove! Love!


Please tune into INSIDE OUT LGBT RADIO Show today Tuesday, December 10, 2pm-3pm EST as we discuss the topic of “Being Financially Responsible into the New Year & Beyond.” Tune in from the DMV at WPFW 89.3 FM or stream live ANYWHERE from your computer, phone or tablet at Join the conversation with questions and to share your thoughts at 202-588-0893. Please share and spread the word.

Today’s show is dedicated to our beloved Ron “MF” Davis who on this day 10 years ago made his transition to become our angel. And, it’s no doubt that many truly love and miss him. However, he left such a profound legacy of humans who are being and doing amazing things in this world of ours. See details below for a gathering this evening in DC.

DC Caribbean Carnival

Our show guests and a very dynamic group of entrepreneurs who are of great contribution to supporting others in building and maintaining wealth include:

The RevCoach, La Tonia Taylor of ReBirth International and Iyanla: Fix My Life

Bonita Grant – Owner, Cure My Credit Score

Querin Hamilton – Credit Analyst, Cure My Credit Score

During the show our guests will discuss financial responsibility in the areas of breaking generational cycles, healing self-sabotaging patterns, creating good credit practices, and building a financial legacy.

Also, please join us tonight over libations and vittles, to honor our dear friend Ron with good holiday cheer, fun memories, and laughs.

Tuesday, December 10, 2019


Mr. Braxton Bar & Kitchen

3632 Georgia Ave, NW Washington, DC 20010

Bet. Otis Pl. & Princeton Pl.

Thank you for the love and support. Send us good vibes. Please join us and enjoy! Make it a safe and beautiful day and week. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove!#WPFW #InsideOutLGBTRadioShow #BeDoLove #FindYourZen #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFULLPurpose #JuicySweetSpot #LivingOutLoud #FinancialWisdom #CreditRepair

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Saggalicious Birthday Alert! – 53!!! BOOM!!!

First, The Jewelry Shout Out:

-Agate Slice and Copper Rope Chain and Copper Earrings curated by Zoe Isaac of Zoe Lifestyle International. Zoe DID THAT!!!

-Special shout out to me dear friend Ardella who gifted me the Agate Slice that was owned by her mother. I hope Ms. Angie’s spirit is pleased with Zoe’s magical creativity.

Today, on this here Thanksgiving Day I’m beyond blessed and full of gratitude to be celebrating my birthday. Happy Birthday to ME! 🥳 The cool thing is, Pop turned 90 on Father’s Day. And, here I am today. And, the last time I woke up in the same house on my birthday with my dad was during my high school years. So this one is super special. And, it’s only fitting on this Thanksgiving day to give thanks to Pop and his will and spirit to live. He is my beautiful birthday gift (He asked me like five times what I wanted.)

As for Kathryn big ups, the past two years have been full of purposeful reflection, processing, growing, healing past wounds/traumas, releasing, evolving, and REBIRTHING, mixed with a balance of pleasure. The work I’ve been putting in requires much of me. It ain’t easy. I thank the Rev Coach La Tonia Taylor of Rebirth International. I love the me that I’m becoming because even now at 53 it’s never too late to seek and have freedom, joy, and purpose. You remember that for yourself. YOU deserve YOU.

Today I’m also grateful for my family and friends who’ve showed up for me and Pop this year. It means the world to us. We appreciate and love YOU! 💜💜💜

Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy my lovelies. Be good to each other and especially to YOU! Let us be joyful and glad in it. Blessings upon blessing to you. Love! #BeDoLove

And, I gift you with two of my favorites below. Love!

“Gratitude is a tangible force. The more you feel it, the more reasons you will find to feel it. Gratitude is a miraculous force, like a magical magnet, generating and then attracting so much more than you have already received.” — Lazaris

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

–From A Return to Love, by Marianne Williamson

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BE an Advocate – Adventures of a HAWT Caregiver & Dope Pop

Pop and Dr. Kathryn Kelly – November 2019

We paid a visit to the doctor yesterday. Pop got some things checked out. He’s gained 13 pounds. YAAAYYYY!!! In the spirit of Thanksgiving we have so much to be grateful for with the blessings bestowed upon Pop. He’s giving cancer the business. And, with it being my birthday week, I got my annual wellness exam. I lost 9 pounds. YAAAAYYY!!!

Shout out to a fellow Howard University “Showtime” Bison, Tau Beta Sigma soror, and friend Dr. Kathryn Kelly. She’s my primary care as well as Pops now since he’s moved here with me. I like Dr. Kelly because there are no short cuts with her. She’s compassionate, smart, and will explore a situation in detail. And, she goes above and beyond to care for her patients and seeks to support communities in need of proper healthcare. Much thanks and gratitude to you Dr. Kelly. Big sis is truly proud of you for the woman you’ve become (and becoming) and all that you’ve accomplished.

Going to the doctor, I’m reminded about how the healthcare system can be very tricky. Because it’s health based it’s about care and compassion. However, it’s also about business. And, the business aspect of it can leave one feeling confused, hopeless and depleted.

Since July, my family and I were thrown into the healthcare system of angels and wolves so to speak. I’ve had to navigate a multitude of healthcare professionals, hospitals, diagnosis, and having Pop’s health insurance switched (that’s for another post). Good thing I’ve had a lifeboat of healthcare industry friends, dear friends, family, God, Gangsta Angels, and my own putting on my big girl preserverance panties to get through it.

Scenario 1: Within a week of Pop’s colostomy surgery the hospital was attempting to discharge him. Trying to sell that he was all good and strong after this 90 year-old man had been going through IT! However, I knew he required rehab and more special attention just after having surgery and being very sick. The day of the attempted discharge, I had to talk to about 10 hospital personnel from doctors to nurses to case workers to rehab therapists. We were not having it. When they came to evaluate Pop, I had to tell him to cool his heels… There’s a funny story there… Well, you know how that ended right? Pop was moved to rehab. Quite honestly, I was proud of myself. It was a gold star moment during a time that found me experiencing a lot of emotions.

From July-September, Pop was in the hospital for two months and then shortly after that for almost two weeks. During those eight weeks, I observed a lot pertaining to my father’s dealings and other patients, finding that it’s imperative that advocates are present as much as possible. The doctors and nurses need to see you. Also, patients oftentimes want to get out of the hospital ASAP. So when doctors are making rounds they’ll do the Jedi mind tricks on the patient to have them believe they are okay to go home even if they aren’t. The push could be because of insurance pressure and/or because of wanting the bed for the next patient.

Don’t get me wrong, many of the nurses and doctors at Kingsbrook in Brooklyn were amazing and so good with Pop and our family. However, you have to be careful and on your toes when business and/or incompetence comes a knocking.

Scenario 2: Pop needed a Pet Scan. They didn’t have the machine in the hospital and said he would have to wait till he was discharged to go for the test. NOT! We needed results ASAP! After much back and forth, he was eventually transported to get the test.

Both scenarios we were told one thing about his insurance and with further investigation and pushing, it was found to not to be true.

Be there for your people. After those two months, they knew the Boxill’s up in that hospital. Be gracious and friendly (it goes a long way) yet put your stern “Not today” hat on when necessary. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t fall for the okie doke. Question it. Advocate. Don’t take no as an answer the first, second or even third time. Most times with persistence it can become a yes. And, seek a trusted person(s) who can provide patient rights advice. I was so blessed in this area. But, I had to make calls and ask for help. Oh, advocates. Don’t be too proud to request help. Drop the pride and ego based mindset. You don’t have to be the lone savior and super person. What you’re going through is not new. You too deserve support.

And, family be there for family. Shout out to my brothers Terence, Gregory, and Alec (by phone) who were there at the hospital every step of the way. Friends be there for your friends (I was so appreciative when my friends came to visit Pop (and me) in the hospital.). They may seem strong and capable, however, they need you and the distraction. Even if it’s a phone call to check in on them. A lunch outing. Cocktails. Relieving them at the hospital so they can get rest. After all, they need love and care too. Be well! #CaregiversMatter

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Adventures of a HAWT Caregiver & Dope Pop – The Art of Becoming

Pop in his way of being and still “becoming” at 90 years of age is teaching me that it’s never too late to “Become”. Become patient. Become grace. Become mercy. Become forgiveness. Become unconditional love. Become with gratitude. Become funny. Become silly. Become a learner. Become a teacher. Become as a daughter. Become as a caregiver. Become a nurturer. Become a lover. Become a creator. Become dope. Become a mother. Become compassionate. Become relaxed. Become calm. Become unbothered. Become through the use of my voice. Become me. Become with self-love. Become with self-care. Become with love.

All of these ways of being that are already in me and of me. I just get to incorporate an all-knowing that they are in me and of me each and every moment I breathe.

And, know and believe that it’s NEVER too late for you too to “become” all that you desire from the simplicities of life to your wildest dreams. Happy Sunday y’all. Love! 💜💜💜

PS: He’s rotating/reading like three books. Thank you Michelle Obama for this wonderful gift of literature that Pop is enjoying. #CaregiversMatter #Becoming #MichelleObama

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Pop Loves Jeopardy – Howard University’s Love For Marian Anderson!

Pop has been an avid Jeopardy viewer for yeaaaarrrssss. You best be sure at 7pm in NY and now 7:30pm in the DMV that he’s front and center.

Pop Wearing His Jeopardy Cap!

I was delighted and so proud that while watching it with Pop last night, a Howard University question (Howard is EVERYWHERE!) was the final Jeopardy question.

“In 1939, turned down by 2 local theaters, Howard University was able to get an outdoor venue for this singer’s yearly concert.” Alex, Who is Marian Anderson (Jeopardy James is at it again.).

From the story and footage of the concert, regardless of all she endured during those times, Marian Anderson seemed to be a woman and beautiful singer of great dignity and pride. Being turned down by the DAR was poetic justice as Constitution Hall was not fit for a woman of such grace. And, at the Lincoln Memorial her audience stretched far and wide not just on those steps but through the airwaves.

According to Wikipedia: “In 1939, the Daughters of the American Revolution (DAR) refused permission for Anderson to sing to an integrated audience in Constitution Hall in Washington, DC. The incident placed Anderson into the spotlight of the international community on a level unusual for a classical musician. With the aid of First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt and her husband Franklin D. Roosevelt, Anderson performed a critically acclaimed open-air concert on Easter Sunday, April 9, 1939, on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in the capital. She sang before an integrated crowd of more than 75,000 people and a radio audience in the millions.”

There’s also a documentary about it called “Marian Anderson: The Lincoln Memorial Concert”. Here’s an excerpt.

Here’s a story and listen from NPR’s WAMU.

Thank you to our ancestor Marian Anderson for being you as an example of grace and dignity and for gifting the world with beautiful voice. Love!

#BeDoLove #CaregiversMatter #MarianAnderson #Jeopardy

#Howarding #HowardUniversity #BisonLove #BisonPride #Bison4Life #BisonStrong #InTruthAndService #BleedBlue #TheMecca #HUYouKnow #ImSoGladIWentToHowardU #AintNoPartyLikeAnHUParty

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Fall Season = Warm Connections, Boots, Colors, Vineyards, Wineries, Breweries, Good Food & Fun

Virginia has some wonderful vineyards, wineries, and now breweries. Saturday I hung out with one of my favorite couples Tony (my long time friend bonded by Howard University, “Showtime” Marching Band, and KKY/TBS) and Patricia Humphrey (also a Bison) for some Fall fun down in Loudoun County, VA, which has some great wine and beer.

We 1st visited the Quattro Goomba’s (Meaning 4 friends. Which are the 4 friends who opened the spot.) Winery & Brewery. Came for the wine tasting (which was a nice selection), beer, and the much heard about Sicilian pizza which was sooooo delish. Not so CAAAARRRBBBISH feeling. Light crust. And, the beer flight I perfectly curated with Dark Cherry (chocolate, cherry, milk stout), Resistance (mango & Passionfruit wheat), infatuation (pumpkin spice saison), and Winter (Belgian quad).

We then ventured to the Stone Tower Winery. The spaciousness and beautiful view were the highlights. Oh, they do have a very nice Port Wine.

And, because we couldn’t stop talking about the Sicilian pizza, we returned to Quattro Goomba for seconds. Yeah! That good. And, washed it down with a wine slushy, which they failed to tell us about during our first stop there. And, that concludes our wonderful Fall outing. Till next time. Cheers to you from three friends (missed it by one for the Quattro)! 😉

PS: Still salivating from my last visit down this way to Delaplane Cellars, where the Petit Manseng is something special. And, those Apple Cider Donuts at Aspen Dale Winery at the Barn.

PSS: Darn! I forgot to take a pic of me wearing my boots. And, they are new and cute. 🥴 Any who! Enjoy the beautiful colors of Fall. One mo’ ‘gain, Cheers! 😍

#BeDoLove #FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #BeDoLoveSAVOR #IDineToWriteAboutIt #Yummyliciousness #FallFoilage #Wine #Winery #Vineyard #Brewery #VirginiaWines #VirginiaWineries #VirginiaBeer #VirginiaCraftBeer #VirginiaIsForCraftBeerLovers

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Morning Pop Talk – When You Don’t Get Invited/RIP Elijah Cummings

Pop Morning Talk – The President Never Gets Invited – Pop: Cummings service is today. The presidents are going to speak. (Talking about The Honorable Congressman Elijah Cummings funeral service.)

Me: (looking like ??? what presidents)

Pop: Obama and Clinton are speaking. That must be a bitch. That nobody invites you to anything. That McCain thing was something else. And, then he talks about he’s the greatest president ever.

The morale of the story: You are ostracized when being an a..hole or mean girl. And, if you are one of those people and are being invited to the party it may be more so out of obligation, fear, or to use you.

Check yourself regarding your relationships. Are you operating with love or fear/control that has you crossing boundaries with treating others poorly? Being abusive to include emotionally and/or verbally? If so, don’t confuse your access with acceptance. You can be kind, nice and loving and still WIN! Exemplified by President Obama and Congressman Cummings that while this son of Howard University was a fierce warrior he was also a man that exemplified love, kindness, and grace and still WON! HUUUUU…

Oh, Pop say’s “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!” Cheers!

PS: Pic was taken at Trinidadian Owner and Chef Peter Prime’s restaurant “Cane” on H Street in DC. They serve yummylicious Caribbean Street Food. Check out Obama in the pic in Trinidad eating doubles, which is a simple yet very tasty Trini street food usually eaten for breakfast. It is made with two baras filled with curry channa, chutneys, hot sauce, and tamarind sauce (extra for me please). Mmmmm… #BeDoLove #MorningPopTalk #CaregiversMatter #Yummyliciousness #BeDoLoveSAVOR #IDineToWriteAboutIt #TasteDC #dceats #dcfoodporn #dcfoodie #dcdining

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🎶I Know You Heard Me on the Radio. TRRUUUUEEEE!!!🎶 – A Special Howard University Homecoming/LGBTQ Show

Please join us for A Howard University Homecoming Special Show “Moving the LGBTQ Community Forward on College Campuses.”

All members of the LGBTQ community, allies, and those who are open to listening with a loving ear to a different perspective from your’s are welcome to join us on WPFW-FM’s “INSIDE OUT LGBT RADIO Show” today, Tuesday, October 8, 2019 from 2pm-3pm EST. Tune in from the DMV at 89.3 FM or stream live ANYWHERE from your computer, phone or tablet at

I’m super excited as a Howard grad to share that we will have special current students and alumni guests. To include HUSA VP, Raina Henderson, CASCADE VP, Michael Franklin, and alum, Jessica Teachey. And, you’re welcome and encouraged to call in and share at 202-588-0893. Please share and spread the word.

The theme for this homecoming is “Forward”. In a recent correspondence President Frederic said “As we welcome alumni and friends back to campus, we invite the entire Howard community to get in the Homecoming spirit, fellowship and collaborate on ways to move the institution forward.”

During the show, we’ll discuss the importance of Howard University continuing to move “forward” with ensuring the LGBTQ community is welcomed, engaged, connected, and thriving. Particularly at an HBCU where the stigma of being an LGBTQ African American can be challenging from a historical perspective.

Thank you for the love and support. Send us good vibes. Please join us and enjoy! Make it a safe and beautiful day and week. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove! Bison Love! #WPFW #InsideOutLGBTRadioShow #BeDoLove #FindYourZen #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFULLPurpose #JuicySweetSpot #LivingOutLoud #LGBTQLivesMatter #HowardUniversity #HUYouKnow #HBCU #TheRealHU #BisonLove #BisonPride #BisonStrong #InTruthAndService #BleedBlue #TheMecca #HUYouKnow #ImSoGladIWentToHowardU #AintNoPartyLikeAnHUParty #HowardHomecoming2019

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Morning Pop Talk – He’s Baaaaccckkk and Shining Bright

After almost two months in the hospital to include a colostomy emergency surgery, colon cancer diagnosis, rehab, and gaining 9 mistresses, 5 adopted daughters, 3 adoptive sons, and loads and loads of admirers throughout Kingsbrook Hospital in my hometown Crown Heights, Brooklyn, Pop was released about a month ago. I immediately whisked him off to Maryland to live with me.

We struggled a bit to get the rhythm of changing the Ostomy bag. Not for the faint of heart, I tell you. It is truly a labor of love and one I had great trepidation about. Mishaps had me frustrated with some crying spells to one day I loudly called out to my beloved ancestors (my grandmother and Aunt Barbara) for help and guidance. And, I tell you within a few hours they guided me to a step I was missing. DUUUHHHH!!! 🤭

A week and a half ago I had to take Pop back to Brooklyn to deal with a situation which required a minor procedure. While it was a WTF moment it was also met with great humor. He had a colostomy prolapse where his stoma grew from the size of a golf ball to a three inch penis. I know. I know. 😳 The doctor described it similar to when you have a hemorrhoid and it comes out. Pop told my Aunt Vilma he was going to have a circumcision. 🤣🤣🤣 Gotta love his sense of humor which I see where I get mine from. Once again, he came through the surgery with flying colors. However, while there we received additional test results showing that the cancer is not only in his colon, but also his liver and lungs making it stage four.

🎶Don’t cry for us Argentina…🎶 No pity party here please. Shown by this picture, the sun continues to shine brightly on Pop. Pop is walking, singing, laughing, can fend for himself, doing his daily reading, crossword puzzles and wonderword in the New Post newspaper (Thankfully they carry it in my around the corner Giant.). He is truly a 90 year-old beautiful, spirited warrior of great strength. I am extremely grateful for that since I may be in a different place emotionally if not for it.

As we establish a new normal, decisions are to be made. So please pray for his continued strength. He’s continued peace and calm. Pray that the appropriate decisions will be made and those required (doctors, nurses, health insurance people, home care attendants, friends, family, etc., etc., etc.) to travel this road with ease, knowledge and compassion are divinely led to us. And, pray for my family and I for our peace, calm, patience, compassion, strength to include advocacy, and continued joy in ALL.OF.IT! And, pray and look out for others who are also in the phase of their lives where their parents require their support, assistance, and a very special kind of love.

There have been lessons upon lessons upon lessons through all this and I’m sure more to come. Some may say too much information “TMI” Kathryn. Could be embarrassed if they were going through something similar or their own THING. Well, I’ve dealt with enough pain, isolation, and sadness and ain’t got NO MORE time to suffer and suffocate in silence. Shame, pride, and it being all about how it looks kills the spirit. I get to share while being respectful and honoring my father, with the hope this touches someone in a way to know they aren’t alone in their situation, that they are loved, that there are people out there who can support them, and they too can share and LET.IT.OUT.AND.GO within their safe spaces. So, thank you for being my safe space. I’m going to come back as often as possible to share about Pop and what I’m learning whether personal lessons or those through navigating the layers upon layers of the health system.

Well, at Pop’s request I’m going to file his nails because grooming still matters to him. Get myself together to go get Pop’s newspaper and get his lunch ready. New normal. And, then go cheer on the Washington Mystics to a WNBA championship. Because, I get to still live, love, and laugh.

With that, Pop say’s “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!”

And, the beat goes on. With good spirits. Gratitude! And, Love! #MorningPopTalk #BeDoLove

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