Please tune into INSIDE OUT LGBT RADIO SHOW today, Tuesday, January 7, 2pm-3pm EST as we discuss the topic of “How to Make a Difference Supporting the LGBTQ Community.” Tune in from the DMV at WPFW 89.3 FM or stream live ANYWHERE from your computer, phone or tablet at www.wpfwfm.org.

While, we’ve witnessed incredible change and progress in how the District of Columbia’s LGBTQ community is supported, there is still much work to be done. My guest is Sheila Alexander-Reid, who is the Director of The Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs. Please join us for a discussion on the successes as well as the areas of concern to the community (i.e., youth homelessness, housing vouchers, seniors, transgender rights) and how the office is and how you can be a difference.

Thank you for the love and support. Send us good vibes. Please join us and enjoy! Make it a safe and beautiful day and week. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove! #WPFW #InsideOutLGBTRadioShow #BeDoLove #FindYourZen #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFULLPurpose #JuicySweetSpot #LivingOutLoud #LGBTQLivesMatter #RespectMeDC #MayorsOfficeOfLGBTQAffairs

If you know a caregiver (who doesn’t nowadays), pay them visits. Offer to do something fun with them alone so they can exhale or by including their loved one(s). If you’re the caregiver, release the shame, pride, or the savior “woe is me” mentality. Be gentle with yourself. Remember, you’re not alone in this. You’re not the only one. Invite trusted loved ones to support you during this time. It may require you to expand and extend your net as those you hoped aren’t available.

Moments of fun should be allowed to flow, lighten up, and heal. Request it. Receive it. You deserve to experience joy and pleasure in the midst of it all. Your loved one deserves it. And, your tribe deserves being a gift to you and yours. It truly is the circle of a love-filled and purposeful life. And, I’m so grateful for my tribe who have and continue to be there beyond the lip service with actually being there and showing up. A gift and example.

A couple of months ago Pop requested a Scrabble game. While I’m not a big Scrabble player, I honored his request. Yesterday when mentioning he has a Scrabble play date that included yummylicious Christmas leftovers and Pineapple Jalepeno Margaritas:

Pop: Wait a minute. I haven’t played in a while. That was for me and you to play. People can get really serious when they play.

Me: Pop it ain’t that type of party.

(pause)

Pop: I ain’t scared.

Well my Howard University Bison sisters came to the rescue. Ardella and I also hadn’t played in a while. Zoe gets it in with her mom so she was able to help with the rules. And, with the daily hours of reading, crossword puzzles, and word scramble 90 year-old Pop does, his vocabulary is extensive. Hence him playing “gladden”, “quint” and “en”. Who in the world knows that “en” is a word?!? 😳 Pop won by a point over Zoe. Me third. Ardella forth. While departing, Ardella declared she’s going to learn some words for the next Scrabble play date. Perhaps I should too, as I pause to appreciate the beautiful gifts of life. And, not wanting to get clobbered (oh that’s a good one) by Pop and Zoe the next time. In the meantime, here’s to wishing you Fun, Laughter, Peace, and Love to you now and ALWAYS! WORD! 😉 Ase #CareGiversMatter #Scrabble #Wordsmith #MyTribeIsDope #BeDoLove #BisonLove #BleedBlue #HowardUniversity #AintNoPartyLikeAnHUParty #InTruthAndService

Pop: 🎶Goooood Morning! Happy Boxing Day.🎶 Not, Happy Boxill Day. But, Happy Boxing Day. But, Happy Boxill Day too.

Me: 😳😆 Pop, What is Boxing Day?

Pop: It started in England. In Trinidad it’s a holiday where people wore costumes and steel bands played similar to carnival. I don’t know if they do that anymore. (See a description of Boxing Day below that’s related to slavery.)

Pop: On Christmas Day people would come around playing guitars and singing Christmas carols or other music. (Me: Parang. ((See description and must see video below.))) For Christmas even as children we would have wine or really good port wine. Although I didn’t have anything to drink yesterday. (Pop is still salty that he didn’t have a drink yesterday since he’s on an antibiotic.)

As Pop would say, “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!” “Oh, and Happy Holidays!” #MorningPopTalk #CareGiversMatter

PS: Santa gave Pop an iPad for Christmas. He loves to play games like Solitaire, Mahjong, and Bridge. Although I doubt it, maybe he’ll read from it. I think he prefers the feel of the newspapers and books. Any other games you think he may like?

PSS: My bucket list is to visit Trinidad for Christmas. I love love love string instruments to now include the cuatro. I looked up Boxing Day. And, there are various and conflicting theories regarding its origin. One is below. Also, below is a nice video on Parang. So interesting and rich in history. Trinidad continues to amaze me as a very diverse country. Chinese, Indians, Venezuelans…

Boxing Day

“There’s not one agreed-upon origin story for Boxing Day — the deeper you dig, the greater the confusion. What we know for sure is that the holiday originated in Britain, back in medieval times.

Common theories all involve some variation on the theme of giving to those less fortunate. Some believe the term “Boxing Day” comes from the practice of the rich donating a wooden box of Christmas leftovers to their servants and apprentices — who would work Christmas Day, but have December 26 off to celebrate with their families. It could also refer to collection boxes set up at churches, their contents distributed to the poor on December 26 — the day of the Feast of St. Stephen, a Christian martyr known for acts of charity… In Caribbean regions that were once under British rule, the charity box exchange on December 26 wasn’t between aristocrats and employees — it was between slave-owners and their slaves. Boxing Day was likely the only day off from forced labor that slaves received all year. Among their descendants, December 26 has become a dance party, a day of artistic expression, and a celebration of Afro-Caribbean culture… The Boxing Day street parade in Trinidad & Tobago is J’ouvert, which in this case is the opening party of the larger celebration of Carnival.” — https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.thrillist.com/amphtml/travel/nation/what-is-boxing-day

Parang

A Celebration of Parang: The Indigenous Sounds of Trinidad & Tobago https://youtu.be/yVNGLIQfL3A

Parranderos

https://youtu.be/phgXXU91jtU

“Parang is a popular folk music originating from Venezuela and Trinidad and Tobago that was brought to Trinidad and Tobago by Venezuelan and Colombian migrants who were primarily of Amerindian, Spanish, Mestizo, Pardo, Cocoa panyol, and African heritage, something which is strongly reflected in the music itself. The word is derived from two Spanish words: parranda, meaning “a spree or fête”, and parar meaning “to stop”.

In Trinidad, traditional parang music is largely performed around Christmastime, when singers and instrumentalists (collectively known as the parranderos) travel from house to house in the community, often joined by friends and neighbours family etc. using whatever instruments are at hand. In exchange for the entertainment, parranderos are traditionally given food and drink: pasteles, pastelle, sorrel, rum and Ponche Crema (a form of alcoholic eggnog).” — https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parang

Update: If you missed this amazing and VERY INFORMATIVE show, click the link to listen in. http://archive.wpfwfm.org/mp3/wpfw_191210_140000lmpab.mp3

Enjoy the show at home, your desk, while driving, preparing dinner… You may also subscribe to our podcast on iTunes at WPFW – Inside Out to enjoy previously recorded shows.

Come back and share your thoughts. Thank you for the love and support. See you next time. Make it a safe and beautiful week. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove! Love!

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Please tune into INSIDE OUT LGBT RADIO Show today Tuesday, December 10, 2pm-3pm EST as we discuss the topic of “Being Financially Responsible into the New Year & Beyond.” Tune in from the DMV at WPFW 89.3 FM or stream live ANYWHERE from your computer, phone or tablet at www.wpfwfm.org. Join the conversation with questions and to share your thoughts at 202-588-0893. Please share and spread the word.

Today’s show is dedicated to our beloved Ron “MF” Davis who on this day 10 years ago made his transition to become our angel. And, it’s no doubt that many truly love and miss him. However, he left such a profound legacy of humans who are being and doing amazing things in this world of ours. See details below for a gathering this evening in DC.

Our show guests and a very dynamic group of entrepreneurs who are of great contribution to supporting others in building and maintaining wealth include:

The RevCoach, La Tonia Taylor of ReBirth International and Iyanla: Fix My Life

Bonita Grant – Owner, Cure My Credit Score

Querin Hamilton – Credit Analyst, Cure My Credit Score

During the show our guests will discuss financial responsibility in the areas of breaking generational cycles, healing self-sabotaging patterns, creating good credit practices, and building a financial legacy.

Also, please join us tonight over libations and vittles, to honor our dear friend Ron with good holiday cheer, fun memories, and laughs.

Tuesday, December 10, 2019

5pm-8pm

Mr. Braxton Bar & Kitchen

3632 Georgia Ave, NW Washington, DC 20010

Bet. Otis Pl. & Princeton Pl.

Thank you for the love and support. Send us good vibes. Please join us and enjoy! Make it a safe and beautiful day and week. Be great. Be courageous. Be Bold. BeDoLove!#WPFW #InsideOutLGBTRadioShow #BeDoLove #FindYourZen #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFULLPurpose #JuicySweetSpot #LivingOutLoud #FinancialWisdom #CreditRepair

First, The Jewelry Shout Out:

-Agate Slice and Copper Rope Chain and Copper Earrings curated by Zoe Isaac of Zoe Lifestyle International. Zoe DID THAT!!!

-Special shout out to me dear friend Ardella who gifted me the Agate Slice that was owned by her mother. I hope Ms. Angie’s spirit is pleased with Zoe’s magical creativity.

Today, on this here Thanksgiving Day I’m beyond blessed and full of gratitude to be celebrating my birthday. Happy Birthday to ME! 🥳 The cool thing is, Pop turned 90 on Father’s Day. And, here I am today. And, the last time I woke up in the same house on my birthday with my dad was during my high school years. So this one is super special. And, it’s only fitting on this Thanksgiving day to give thanks to Pop and his will and spirit to live. He is my beautiful birthday gift (He asked me like five times what I wanted.)

As for Kathryn big ups, the past two years have been full of purposeful reflection, processing, growing, healing past wounds/traumas, releasing, evolving, and REBIRTHING, mixed with a balance of pleasure. The work I’ve been putting in requires much of me. It ain’t easy. I thank the Rev Coach La Tonia Taylor of Rebirth International. I love the me that I’m becoming because even now at 53 it’s never too late to seek and have freedom, joy, and purpose. You remember that for yourself. YOU deserve YOU.

Today I’m also grateful for my family and friends who’ve showed up for me and Pop this year. It means the world to us. We appreciate and love YOU! 💜💜💜

Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy my lovelies. Be good to each other and especially to YOU! Let us be joyful and glad in it. Blessings upon blessing to you. Love! #BeDoLove

And, I gift you with two of my favorites below. Love!

“Gratitude is a tangible force. The more you feel it, the more reasons you will find to feel it. Gratitude is a miraculous force, like a magical magnet, generating and then attracting so much more than you have already received.” — Lazaris

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

–From A Return to Love, by Marianne Williamson

Pop and Dr. Kathryn Kelly – November 2019

We paid a visit to the doctor yesterday. Pop got some things checked out. He’s gained 13 pounds. YAAAYYYY!!! In the spirit of Thanksgiving we have so much to be grateful for with the blessings bestowed upon Pop. He’s giving cancer the business. And, with it being my birthday week, I got my annual wellness exam. I lost 9 pounds. YAAAAYYY!!!

Shout out to a fellow Howard University “Showtime” Bison, Tau Beta Sigma soror, and friend Dr. Kathryn Kelly. She’s my primary care as well as Pops now since he’s moved here with me. I like Dr. Kelly because there are no short cuts with her. She’s compassionate, smart, and will explore a situation in detail. And, she goes above and beyond to care for her patients and seeks to support communities in need of proper healthcare. Much thanks and gratitude to you Dr. Kelly. Big sis is truly proud of you for the woman you’ve become (and becoming) and all that you’ve accomplished.

Going to the doctor, I’m reminded about how the healthcare system can be very tricky. Because it’s health based it’s about care and compassion. However, it’s also about business. And, the business aspect of it can leave one feeling confused, hopeless and depleted.

Since July, my family and I were thrown into the healthcare system of angels and wolves so to speak. I’ve had to navigate a multitude of healthcare professionals, hospitals, diagnosis, and having Pop’s health insurance switched (that’s for another post). Good thing I’ve had a lifeboat of healthcare industry friends, dear friends, family, God, Gangsta Angels, and my own putting on my big girl preserverance panties to get through it.

Scenario 1: Within a week of Pop’s colostomy surgery the hospital was attempting to discharge him. Trying to sell that he was all good and strong after this 90 year-old man had been going through IT! However, I knew he required rehab and more special attention just after having surgery and being very sick. The day of the attempted discharge, I had to talk to about 10 hospital personnel from doctors to nurses to case workers to rehab therapists. We were not having it. When they came to evaluate Pop, I had to tell him to cool his heels… There’s a funny story there… Well, you know how that ended right? Pop was moved to rehab. Quite honestly, I was proud of myself. It was a gold star moment during a time that found me experiencing a lot of emotions.

From July-September, Pop was in the hospital for two months and then shortly after that for almost two weeks. During those eight weeks, I observed a lot pertaining to my father’s dealings and other patients, finding that it’s imperative that advocates are present as much as possible. The doctors and nurses need to see you. Also, patients oftentimes want to get out of the hospital ASAP. So when doctors are making rounds they’ll do the Jedi mind tricks on the patient to have them believe they are okay to go home even if they aren’t. The push could be because of insurance pressure and/or because of wanting the bed for the next patient.

Don’t get me wrong, many of the nurses and doctors at Kingsbrook in Brooklyn were amazing and so good with Pop and our family. However, you have to be careful and on your toes when business and/or incompetence comes a knocking.

Scenario 2: Pop needed a Pet Scan. They didn’t have the machine in the hospital and said he would have to wait till he was discharged to go for the test. NOT! We needed results ASAP! After much back and forth, he was eventually transported to get the test.

Both scenarios we were told one thing about his insurance and with further investigation and pushing, it was found to not to be true.

Be there for your people. After those two months, they knew the Boxill’s up in that hospital. Be gracious and friendly (it goes a long way) yet put your stern “Not today” hat on when necessary. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t fall for the okie doke. Question it. Advocate. Don’t take no as an answer the first, second or even third time. Most times with persistence it can become a yes. And, seek a trusted person(s) who can provide patient rights advice. I was so blessed in this area. But, I had to make calls and ask for help. Oh, advocates. Don’t be too proud to request help. Drop the pride and ego based mindset. You don’t have to be the lone savior and super person. What you’re going through is not new. You too deserve support.

And, family be there for family. Shout out to my brothers Terence, Gregory, and Alec (by phone) who were there at the hospital every step of the way. Friends be there for your friends (I was so appreciative when my friends came to visit Pop (and me) in the hospital.). They may seem strong and capable, however, they need you and the distraction. Even if it’s a phone call to check in on them. A lunch outing. Cocktails. Relieving them at the hospital so they can get rest. After all, they need love and care too. Be well! #CaregiversMatter

Pop in his way of being and still “becoming” at 90 years of age is teaching me that it’s never too late to “Become”. Become patient. Become grace. Become mercy. Become forgiveness. Become unconditional love. Become with gratitude. Become funny. Become silly. Become a learner. Become a teacher. Become as a daughter. Become as a caregiver. Become a nurturer. Become a lover. Become a creator. Become dope. Become a mother. Become compassionate. Become relaxed. Become calm. Become unbothered. Become through the use of my voice. Become me. Become with self-love. Become with self-care. Become with love.

All of these ways of being that are already in me and of me. I just get to incorporate an all-knowing that they are in me and of me each and every moment I breathe.

And, know and believe that it’s NEVER too late for you too to “become” all that you desire from the simplicities of life to your wildest dreams. Happy Sunday y’all. Love! 💜💜💜

PS: He’s rotating/reading like three books. Thank you Michelle Obama for this wonderful gift of literature that Pop is enjoying. #CaregiversMatter #Becoming #MichelleObama

Pop has been an avid Jeopardy viewer for yeaaaarrrssss. You best be sure at 7pm in NY and now 7:30pm in the DMV that he’s front and center.

Pop Wearing His Jeopardy Cap!

I was delighted and so proud that while watching it with Pop last night, a Howard University question (Howard is EVERYWHERE!) was the final Jeopardy question.

“In 1939, turned down by 2 local theaters, Howard University was able to get an outdoor venue for this singer’s yearly concert.” Alex, Who is Marian Anderson (Jeopardy James is at it again.). https://youtu.be/G3EUGgTWwnQ

From the story and footage of the concert, regardless of all she endured during those times, Marian Anderson seemed to be a woman and beautiful singer of great dignity and pride. Being turned down by the DAR was poetic justice as Constitution Hall was not fit for a woman of such grace. And, at the Lincoln Memorial her audience stretched far and wide not just on those steps but through the airwaves.

According to Wikipedia: “In 1939, the Daughters of the American Revolution (DAR) refused permission for Anderson to sing to an integrated audience in Constitution Hall in Washington, DC. The incident placed Anderson into the spotlight of the international community on a level unusual for a classical musician. With the aid of First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt and her husband Franklin D. Roosevelt, Anderson performed a critically acclaimed open-air concert on Easter Sunday, April 9, 1939, on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in the capital. She sang before an integrated crowd of more than 75,000 people and a radio audience in the millions.” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marian_Anderson

There’s also a documentary about it called “Marian Anderson: The Lincoln Memorial Concert”. Here’s an excerpt. https://www.dailymotion.com/video/xfo8lh

Here’s a story and listen from NPR’s WAMU.

https://www.npr.org/2014/04/09/298760473/denied-a-stage-she-sang-for-a-nation

Thank you to our ancestor Marian Anderson for being you as an example of grace and dignity and for gifting the world with beautiful voice. Love!

#BeDoLove #CaregiversMatter #MarianAnderson #Jeopardy

#Howarding #HowardUniversity #BisonLove #BisonPride #Bison4Life #BisonStrong #InTruthAndService #BleedBlue #TheMecca #HUYouKnow #ImSoGladIWentToHowardU #AintNoPartyLikeAnHUParty

Virginia has some wonderful vineyards, wineries, and now breweries. Saturday I hung out with one of my favorite couples Tony (my long time friend bonded by Howard University, “Showtime” Marching Band, and KKY/TBS) and Patricia Humphrey (also a Bison) for some Fall fun down in Loudoun County, VA, which has some great wine and beer.

We 1st visited the Quattro Goomba’s (Meaning 4 friends. Which are the 4 friends who opened the spot.) Winery & Brewery. Came for the wine tasting (which was a nice selection), beer, and the much heard about Sicilian pizza which was sooooo delish. Not so CAAAARRRBBBISH feeling. Light crust. And, the beer flight I perfectly curated with Dark Cherry (chocolate, cherry, milk stout), Resistance (mango & Passionfruit wheat), infatuation (pumpkin spice saison), and Winter (Belgian quad).

We then ventured to the Stone Tower Winery. The spaciousness and beautiful view were the highlights. Oh, they do have a very nice Port Wine.

And, because we couldn’t stop talking about the Sicilian pizza, we returned to Quattro Goomba for seconds. Yeah! That good. And, washed it down with a wine slushy, which they failed to tell us about during our first stop there. And, that concludes our wonderful Fall outing. Till next time. Cheers to you from three friends (missed it by one for the Quattro)! 😉

PS: Still salivating from my last visit down this way to Delaplane Cellars, where the Petit Manseng is something special. And, those Apple Cider Donuts at Aspen Dale Winery at the Barn.

PSS: Darn! I forgot to take a pic of me wearing my boots. And, they are new and cute. 🥴 Any who! Enjoy the beautiful colors of Fall. One mo’ ‘gain, Cheers! 😍

#BeDoLove #FindYourZen #LivingOutLoud #BeDoLoveSAVOR #IDineToWriteAboutIt #Yummyliciousness #FallFoilage #Wine #Winery #Vineyard #Brewery #VirginiaWines #VirginiaWineries #VirginiaBeer #VirginiaCraftBeer #VirginiaIsForCraftBeerLovers

Pop Morning Talk – The President Never Gets Invited – Pop: Cummings service is today. The presidents are going to speak. (Talking about The Honorable Congressman Elijah Cummings funeral service.)

Me: (looking like ??? what presidents)

Pop: Obama and Clinton are speaking. That must be a bitch. That nobody invites you to anything. That McCain thing was something else. And, then he talks about he’s the greatest president ever.

The morale of the story: You are ostracized when being an a..hole or mean girl. And, if you are one of those people and are being invited to the party it may be more so out of obligation, fear, or to use you.

Check yourself regarding your relationships. Are you operating with love or fear/control that has you crossing boundaries with treating others poorly? Being abusive to include emotionally and/or verbally? If so, don’t confuse your access with acceptance. You can be kind, nice and loving and still WIN! Exemplified by President Obama and Congressman Cummings that while this son of Howard University was a fierce warrior he was also a man that exemplified love, kindness, and grace and still WON! HUUUUU…

Oh, Pop say’s “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!” Cheers!

PS: Pic was taken at Trinidadian Owner and Chef Peter Prime’s restaurant “Cane” on H Street in DC. They serve yummylicious Caribbean Street Food. Check out Obama in the pic in Trinidad eating doubles, which is a simple yet very tasty Trini street food usually eaten for breakfast. It is made with two baras filled with curry channa, chutneys, hot sauce, and tamarind sauce (extra for me please). Mmmmm… #BeDoLove #MorningPopTalk #CaregiversMatter #Yummyliciousness #BeDoLoveSAVOR #IDineToWriteAboutIt #TasteDC #dceats #dcfoodporn #dcfoodie #dcdining