Morning Pop Talk – A Beautiful Fighting Spirit

Based on the past month I could write a dissertation on Pop and health care. But, I’ll attempt to keep this as brief as possible. It took me a minute to get to the point of sharing with my FB family and those who I know adore Pop.

Pop was admitted to Kingsbrook hospital in Crown Heights, Brooklyn (my birth hood) a month ago. Having trouble swallowing, weak… Upon running test after test after test they found that the left portion of his kidney and colon are connected. Rare. But, happens.

The next step was to do a colonoscopy to find out what was going on with the colon. Before that could happen, Pop became extremely bloated and couldn’t eat. After much complaining about it, tests were done and it was determined that an emergency surgery due to colon blockage was necessary. This resulted in the placement of a colostomy (A surgical operation in which a piece of the colon is diverted to an artificial opening in the abdominal wall so as to bypass a damaged part of the colon.) bag.

Now if you remember Pop turned 90 in June. So doing surgery on him was a concern. However, because of his strong mental capacity they felt comfortable. And, they were correct. Pop came out of the surgery very well. He’s even gained 20 pounds since he first arrived to the hospital.

This past Tuesday they attempted to discharge Pop. I wasn’t having it. He needed rehab in this setting. Because, while he was doing good, his strength wasn’t yet up to par. After talking to about 10 different doctors, nurses, case workers, social workers, physical therapist, occupational therapist asking the same 🤬 questions he was transferred to rehab. There’s a funny story I’ll share later regarding the conversation I had with Pop prior to the therapists coming to do their evaluation. That was a long yet winning day.

The day they attempted to discharge Pop the results from the colonoscopy/biopsy was shared. Pop has colon cancer. Breathe. The next step is to determine his care related to the colon cancer. However, during this process, nodules were found on his lungs and a Pet Scan (A positron emission tomography (PET) scan is an imaging test that helps reveal how your tissues and organs are functioning. A PET scan uses a radioactive drug (tracer) to show this activity. This scan can sometimes detect disease before it shows up on other imaging tests.) needs to be done to determine what’s going on there. And, then the care can be determined. Breathe.

Looks like Pop will be coming back with me when he’s released. Particularly because of the colostomy bag. Breathe.

First Pop has been absolutely amazing through this process. Even when he was feeling his worst he continued to be his witty and charming self. He’s gone through five areas of the hospital to include ICU to now rehab. The women (men too) employees (nurses, tech aides, tv person…) here LOOOVVVVEEEE him. “He’s so cute.” “He’s how old…?” He has them giggling and laughing and even singing to him. Me seeing he’s making their day (hospital environment is no joke) just as much as they are making his day. He and the other Boxill’s have a reputation throughout. Dr. “Easy on the Eyes” Joe just said to me he always likes coming and talking to us because we’re always smiling. (He doesn’t know I was one more “no” from turning into the Tasmanian Devil up in this joint Tuesday.) Pop’s doing his newspaper crossword puzzles, reading the newspaper and books, watching Jeopardy (that CANNOT be missed), and cussing the pres every chance he gets.

Watching him has been such an example of what having good spirits can do for the healing process. It can also help with easing the worry of others. His graciousness and appreciation is such a lovely expression of gratitude. ALWAYS saying thank you to whoever comes in to do something for him. Which is a reminder for me to do the same. A smile, nice tone, and thank you, really does go a long way.

As for me, this has been tough. Adult parenting is tough. The role reversals are real. It’s a moment to moment experience. One moment riding high with the wins (my manifesting having a voice Goddess Warrior has been on fleek) and the next moment experiencing the low vibrations of sadness, fear, anger, woe is me, etc. So I do my best to take it one moment at a time. Allowing myself to feel what I feel and not stuff it. Taking moments to do things I enjoy bringing myself back up and get out of my way and allow the manifesting magical moments to occur. This could be as simple as watching a favorite show, having a good meal, to dancing. Being in the moment (so the doingness doesn’t take over) and not allowing the unknowingly of the future (for Pop and my life) to worry and stress me out. Sure, it’s easy to say…. However, doing my best to be ever present to choosing self-care and pleasure over wallowing in the sadness and pain.

The blessing is my brothers (2 live in Brooklyn) who have been engaged and there. And, they are funny as heck. The blessings are also my niece, nephews, cousins, aunt, and friends (for being there and those in the know) who know and love me and therefore are riding with me to provide those fun and pleasurable moments. The spirit of Brooklyn has also been a blessing. I’ve been here 2-1/2 weeks now (left right after my last radio show), with everyday traveling these streets and sometimes taking nice therapeutic walks through my hood. Even in its hustle and bustle, it’s been healing being here. The blessing is Pop continuing to reassure me. “We’ll be good babe.” The blessing is my boss and team members and their compassion and patience and my ability to telework. The blessing is the entire teams here at the hospital. For the most part they have all been amazing. Customer service is everything to me. The blessing has also been God and my Gangsta Angels. I have absolutely no doubt they have been working on our behalf. The magical ish that’s been occurring is always RIGHT.ON.TIME, heartwarming and humbling.

Prayers please for Pop. Please pray for his continued healing. Please pray for his ability to continue eating comfortably and keep food down. Please pray for answers and clarity to continue to support in further important decision making. Please pray for the reversal of the colostomy. Please pray for ALL the doctors, nurses, therapists, and social workers for their well being, patience, compassion, willingness to break it all the way down for our understanding and clarity and for their urgency to make things happen. Please pray for peace and calm for my father, my family, and me.

I could go on, but I’ll stop here for now. 😉

Okay! I’ll leave with one Pop Talk of many:

(When Pop was very bloated.)

Pop: Motions for me to come down.

(He whispers in my ear.) I’m full of shit.

We bust out laughing. 😂😂😂

Gotta love him.

Oh, Pop say’s “Have a good day. Be safe. Don’t work too hard. Love!”

And, the beat goes on. With good spirits. Gratitude! And, Love! #MorningPopTalk

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