Since my early 20s, I’ve been in seeking and work mode to heal from my childhood to adulthood traumas. From writing to experiential trainings. To in recent years going the therapy route, deciding something new and different was worth a try. As I evolve, traumas planted in my DNA lay dormant just waiting for the next trigger and lesson. Understanding this with the goal of lessening the blow and keeping me from completely and endlessly traveling to “The Sunken Place”. Therefore, I’m always in seeker mode when I’m able to get out of my way and listen to where The Universe is guiding me for my next healing.
Interesting how these lessons can be learned from animals to include dogs. It’s where the divide or differences between animals and humans dissipate when we realize how much we’re really all alike in heart and mind.
Yesterday I watched a show called “Lucky Dog”. The story centered around a dog named Max with an opportunity to be placed with a family. An animal trainer and behaviorist, Brandon, was called in because Max, which is a miniature poodle, was being very aggressive towards larger dogs. Like yeah, I’m small but I’ll bite your head off aggressive. The balls this miniature poodle had.
The first day, Brandon placed Max in the same space with dogs of various sizes. Max played with the small dogs. However, he would bark and lunge at the big dogs. The good thing for Max is the big dogs were trained to not react and open a can of whoop ass on him. Brandon soon found out Max was previously bitten by a larger dog. So now all large dogs were enemy #1. I was tripping, because without fail, with the larger dogs he would take the stance of I’ll show you whose boss before you even think about hurting me. Thinking about how his trauma and fear could have manifested itself in a couple of ways. Either the proactive and defensive aggression he was displaying. Or, the opposite with being very docile. Sounds familiar?
Sometimes people can live their lives without understanding how previous life events to include conversations may be driving their sadness, depression, anger, mistrust, arrogance, aggression, defensive posture, how they treat others physically and/or emotionally… Or completely understanding and it doesn’t matter as they judge, blame, and shame everyone else for their unhealthy and projecting behavior.
The beauty about Max is he had someone loving and nurturing to provide tools and exercises for healing and freedom. Someone he could trust and who patiently helped Max learn to trust bigger dogs while embracing that they are all not the enemy.
We as humans must be as vigilant in our own healing. Acknowledging those things that hold us back from reaching our true potential is half the battle. The other half is seeking out the means, tools, or exercises to help deal and heal our traumas and effectively deal with the triggers. However, it’s not a one size fits all as what resonates for one may not for another. This is anything from journaling, therapy, experiential trainings, church, spiritual counseling, readings, AA and other type of like minded group meetings, addressing those who have victimized you, and the list can go on.
I’ve learned through time that I must stand up for and take responsibility for my healing. Projecting, being the victim, and blaming others for my woes only suffocates and holds me hostage and paralyzed to the pain and fear. Keeping me from being fully immersed and reaching my full passion and purpose potential. Me being that miniature poodle barking and reacting when the fear of perceived control and disrespect from another enters my all I really want is to be loved, heard, understood, and respected space.
How do you handle your traumas? Aggressively and always on the defense or in docile mode, allowing others to continue to violate you? Whatever it is, your life and heart depends on your healing. Your loved ones depend on your healing. Birthing your passion and purpose depend on your healing. Your joyful being depends on your healing. Doesn’t matter how you do it. Therapy or what is for you is for YOU! You may have to try a few things on for YOUR fit. But, don’t allow others to judge or negatively influence your healing choice as they project onto you. Find and attract your supportive tribe. You don’t and shouldn’t have to do it alone.
During the episode Brandon said “Max has to understand that all big dogs are not going to do what that one big dog in the past did to him”. Remember that we all need loving and nurturing Brandon’s in our lives to keep us out of “The Sunken Place”. Trust they are out there. One bad event or apple doesn’t spoil the whole bunch. And, remember that barking at or biting the hand that feeds or loves you never goes over well. The goal is to connect and engage. Not run them away. Happy Healing! For you are love. BE it! DO it! All with LOVE! And, peace be unto YOU! Namaste. #BeDoLove #FindYourZen #BirthAndLiveYourSoulFULLPurpose #JuicySweetSpot #HealingEqualsFreedom #AllRoadsLeadToMentalHealth #SuperSoulSunday
Lucky Dog – http://www.cbsdreamteam.com/lucky-dog/
Max – https://youtu.be/nNEqacbGaRQ
“Get Out” – The Sunken Place – https://youtu.be/kBwVWrBk_uo
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Reading your work is therapy in itself. Beautifully written and so full of truth. I am still looking for my peace as I am always giving to otbers and seem yo have forgotten that I am in need as well.
Reading your work is therapy in itself. Beautifully written and so full of truth. I am still looking for my peace as I am always giving to others and seem to have forgotten that I am in need as well.
Sis may I suggest that this week you do at least one nice thing for you. Something that you love and that gives you peace. And, then do it again next week. Then the next… Till it becomes the norm. Love!